Geoff Geis


To the jerks at Taco Bell…

To the jerks who were at Taco Bell #026839 (Vermont and 8th Street) between 12:10 and 12:30 pm today:

Don’t be mean to the man who gives you your food. It’s not his fault that the Taco Bell that employs him was understaffed at the same time that you all decided to descend upon it. It can’t be very enjoyable to quickly squeeze sauces and fold burritos all day — why make things worse for him?

To the man who called the Taco Bell employee “boy” several times and then referred to the employee as “rude” when he didn’t receive “enough” hot sauce packets: the guy was not being “rude” to you. You referred to him as “boy,” loudly, at least six times. He’s not a boy – he’s middle aged, like you (and he also has a job, which means that he’s more of an adult than your drunk-looking-in-the-middle-of-the-day ass). Calling him “boy” is obviously demeaning, and I find it hard to believe that you aren’t aware of that. Because of your obnoxious behavior, he probably wanted to get you out of his sight before he felt compelled to punch you for being such a dick. If you weren’t such an asshole, maybe he wouldn’t have been in such a hurry and you would’ve gotten your precious sauce.

To the dude who got upset when his “for here” order came in a “to go” bag: it’s really unnecessary to call a stranger a “fucking bitch” because of a mistake like that. Besides, he didn’t take your order — so it probably wasn’t his mistake in the first place. Moreover, each of the tacos came wrapped in disposable papers that could have been unfolded on a table and used instead of a tray. That’s how I ate my “to go” order when I got back to the office, and it worked well.

To the fat teenager who approached the counter with an unwrapped hard shell taco, said simply “I ORDERED a soft shell” in a harsh tone, and then stood there angrily while the man made him a new taco: die, you shitstain, before you find a girlfriend and make more little assholes like yourself. The mistake might not have even been his — did you check your receipt? Maybe the woman who took your order entered it wrong. Even if it was his mistake, cut him some slack! He made like 100 tacos in fifteen minutes – would you be flawless under the same circumstances? It’s fine to ask for a new taco, but be more humble. Try a variation on this next time — “excuse me sir, but I ordered this taco with a soft shell and I received one with a hard shell. Could you please make me another?” You don’t need that many words, but a similar sentiment serves a double purpose — not only will the employee serving you feel better, but that employee will also be less likely to spit in your stupid taco.

To the homeless-looking woman who loudly complained that she should’ve “gone through the drive-thru, where it doesn’t take two hours to get three tacos:” you obviously did not drive here! The drive-thru wasn’t even an option for you — they don’t serve people who walk up to the window of the drive-thru, because doing so is a safety risk. Why are you in such a hurry, anyway? From the look of things, you aren’t on your lunch break and you don’t have anywhere to be (anywhere that might require you to look even remotely presentable, at least). And besides, your food didn’t take two hours. You ordered after me, and my food took fifteen minutes.

Anyway, the dude was working as fast as he can. They aren’t normally that crowded, and they probably could have used another employee or two. His job sucks already, and it sucked unusually hard at that moment.

Why make an innocent man’s life unpleasant? It’s only tacos!!!


Filed under: Human Interest, ,

One Response

  1. moonit says:

    You are a good person, Geoff.

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Also, here are some solo songs I've uploaded recently to Soundcloud. I'm playing solo July 19th at the Pickle Factory at 647 Lamar Street in Los Angeles and September 1st at Los Globos in LA for a KCHUNG benefit.

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